But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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