if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
how does that bad decision feel?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
