batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
