and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
