i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Two words: blizzard sex
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
