he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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