I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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