actually, I'm a sock model
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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