Why are handjobs necessary in class?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
