How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
