I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Randomize
