420 ftw
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
