We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
i now understand why vodka
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
