I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
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