I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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