i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
