How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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