so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize