This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
false alarm, still single
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
