We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
