ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
