come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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