Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
