First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
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