i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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