Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
