Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
