i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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