After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
