just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
