Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
did you just send me my own nude
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Randomize
