If that was your dad, he is hot
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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