Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
He? As in you personified your dick?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
