No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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