I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
