road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
