"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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