That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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