And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
