Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
