Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
We're too hungover to prance.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
