im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
