i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
