Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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