she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
