come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
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