That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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