He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize