I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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