dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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